The Unexpected

With the exception of two friends who inspired me to start this blog, I didn't provided any of my friends with links to it. I wanted to write anonymously so it would free me to write without self censure.

It turns out that a friend accidentally found my blog when she happened to see a comment I left on another blog and followed my profile link. This is how she found out that my biopsy was positive for skin cancer.

When she emailed to inquire about my health and to offer help, she mentioned that the situation kind of felt like reading a room mate's open journal. Of course, my postings have been placed on the Internet for anyone to read so that isn't the case.

On the one hand, I felt abashed for not communicating directly with friends about my health situation but on the other hand I don't want to thrust my problems on them. Frankly, I reread the posting about my fears regarding scarring and felt foolish. That said, what I wrote reflected what I felt at the time. The concern may be petty, but it was one that occupied my thoughts that day and is one that I thought others experiencing similar unknowns may share and reflect upon.

That this friend discovered such timely and personal information about me in this way is an interesting chain of events and a contemporary circumstance that will probably not be unique for long. My evaluation of the situation is evolving. There are both positive and negative aspects to it, and probably many outcomes that I cannot or am not equipped to anticipate.

When I am facing a potential negative outcome, I tend to acknowledge that something positive could happen but not focus on it.

There are several positive outcomes to this situation that I would not have expected. First, it confirmed that I have dear, caring friends. Second, it revealed that someone read my posting and that it resulted in a connection. Third, I reaffirmed that I wanted to keep my blog as it is.

Finally, my doctor confirmed that all of the bad cells were removed. I got my stitches out today and the scar isn't nearly as bad as I imagined it would be.